I have a dear friend who describes a time in her life when one of her parents continually spoke in her place. Someone would ask her a question, and before she had time to answer, another voice would cut her off. It was so frustrating. She was silenced. Someone else thought that they knew her. Perhaps they didn’t want her to make a mistake in her answer. Maybe it was so unconscious that they didn’t even know they were doing it. But it hurt. She wanted to cry out, “Hey, wait a minute. I have an opinion! Let me answer the question.” I guess to varying degrees it has happened to us all, and even though her case was extreme, we can feel the angst that she would have felt. Sometimes we have seen it done to other people. We feel like saying, “Can you hold on a moment? I asked them. I want to know what they think, first hand. That’s why I asked them and not you.”
We would all agree, I think, that the one who answers for another is a villain, and the one without a voice is a victim. Okay, there are some exceptions, but it is natural and proper that every person have their own voice. If this is a crime that stirs us up, what would you say if you learned that a hidden crime spree was taking place under our very noses? That sounds strange, but there is. And I would go so far as to say that someone is answering for you without you realising, not just once but all the time . . .
That got you interested, but what do I mean? Who do I mean?
Let’s start with someone else. Go to the nearest bar and find a drunkard and alcoholic. Ask him what he wants. What does he say? Nearly inevitably he replies, “Another drink would be nice, maybe two.” Think hard. Who is really speaking? Isn’t it his brokenness? Isn’t it his addiction and alcoholism? Somewhere deep within there is a mute soul with desires so deep and real. Slowly he has been rendered mute, and his brokenness answers for him.
Saint Paul was no low-living outcast from society. He had it all together, yet he had the same problem. In Romans chapter seven he describes his difficulty. He was doing what he didn’t want to do and not doing what he wanted to do. He called it his flesh. Sometimes it is also known as self. Paul is very clear that who he was different from this unwelcome intruder answering for him. He asks himself what he wants and his brokenness answers for him. Someone else enquires as to what he likes and doesn’t like. Again his brokenness speaks for him. How irritating. What could he do? He asks the question, “Who can get rid of this unwanted thing that keeps answering for me?”
Fast forward to today. Marketing campaigns and wealthy multinationals exploit this anomaly. Consumerism is out of control. Addiction is rampant. Obesity is everywhere. Perversion is accepted and becoming the norm. We are trying everything to satisfy our souls, but asking another to answer for us. As we feed our insatiable brokenness with the empty pleasures they demand of us, it just becomes stronger and more tyrannical. Our true selves become more oppressed and unhappy. And our brokenness will never let go, until it can drop us into the gutter.
This is not a statement on the evil of society. I am not against commercialism. This is not trying to convince you to stop sinning. I don’t want you to try harder, and please don’t misunderstand me and start feeling guilty. I am not trying to manipulate you or control you. My point is that someone else is. What do you really want. No, not you. Let them answer for themselves. You, yes you, what do you really want?
Isn’t that the most difficult question that you have ever had the pleasure of answering for yourself?
No comments:
Post a Comment